The Alien Life Of An Introvert

Alien Life Introvert

Buddha once said, "A man who conquers himself is greater than one who conquers a thousand men in battle". Since I spend most of the time with myself, this was a pretty easy job for me. Hell yeah!! I'm a conqueror!! But what had I really discovered about myself?!! Alas! I'm an introvert?!! Well, I will be damned! Several questions arose in my mind like "Will my extroverted family members accept my true self, let alone the society? Will they label me as a psychopath or a sociopath?". Soon I began a deep research about introversion. I realized that I shouldn't be so hard on myself. The truth is, sociopaths hate most people. That's not me! I don't hate most people, but I don't like them either. No offense!

Most people still don't get it, they judge too quickly. Well, I don't mind it anymore, let them do what they do best (quick labeling). None of my business. By the way, it is pretty hard being an introvert. I hate small talk and I absolutely hate to go outside just for the sake of blabbering. People talk about materials and possessions. Well, I'm not really materialistic! I guess that sums up everything. I love to have deep conversations, most introverts do; about life, philosophy, psychology, the universe and so on. Such conversations rarely happen with people. But these conversations always happen in my head. Believe me, it's quite interesting. Yet my family finds this weird. Can't fault them cause they are simple minded people, and these are a little complicated to grasp. Now I have stopped explaining myself. Someone was quoted as saying that people only understand from their level of perception. True that!

This is an extroverted world and extroverts are charming chatter boxes. Most people would prefer the charming ones over the silent and gloomy ones. Can't fault them. I mean who wouldn't? General disregard! But, that's exactly what I wish for, no intervention in privacy by most people. Thanks to gloominess! I don't need most people's validation but only the close one's. There are so many misconceptions about introverts. Urgently in need of a 'messenger' to wipe out these misconceptions! Well, there she is!! Susan Cain with her holy book, 'Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking'. I was really moved by this book. Hell yeah! Now I can slam the ignorant critics by exclaiming, "this is INTROVERTAAA (spartaaa)!!!".

My family doesn't like introversion. Unfortunately, they don't read any fancy books, so too much room for misconceptions and well, I'm forced to mingle with people! That's the hardest part. I have to make a 'social quota'. My regular socializing happens when I go to work or when I go to purchase everyday kinds of stuff. I just chit-chat with one or two people just for the sake of that. That's it. My 'social quota' is full. The rest of the day I would try harder to stop making eye contact with someone. One wrong move and I'm doomed! Small talks would pour into my tiny little brain. I would be totally drained and done with it. Well, this is a better mind game than chess! Hell yeah!!

On working days, mostly I'm surrounded by acquaintances. Other days, I prefer to stay at home. TV-series, movies, music and books are my best buddies. With a pillow over my lap I would lean against the wall in my bed and on top of the pillow I would keep a mobile or a book. There is an imprint of myself on the wall and of course, the bed has become paper thin! No pun intended! The thing is, I don't need an idiot to entertain me, I can do it myself. Hell yeah!! I firmly believe that it's not someone else's responsibility to entertain me. Perhaps extroverts need someone else to entertain them and that's not their weakness cause that's the way their brain works. And this is the way my brain works. Well, I'm proud of myself as I'm self-sufficient. "Please don't stick around me, I don't need a sidekick", would be a cool slogan for me.

I have only one or two close friends. I need a lot of alone time to refill my energy once it gets exhausted by excess socializing. When I tell a friend of mine that I need to recharge myself, he would say that he too takes alone time once in a while. I would just smile and think, "God, someone tell this dumbass that this isn't a once in a while requirement for me, rather this is my permanent preferred mode". If I actually tell him this, he would think that I'm a rude person trying to ignore him and that I don't enjoy his company which in fact I don't. Such a retard some extroverts are! I wonder why always people state the obvious?! Whenever someone starts a small talk I would be like, "Okay, come to the point dude, come to the point!". Perhaps they are just warming up and trying to make a connection. I understand, but yet, I just can't stand it most of the time. I'm not being rude here, just being honest to myALIENself.

Do you think I'm a self-serving narcissist? Well, I'm not. I do love and care a lot about my family and if necessary, I would even die for my family! A narcissist only cares about himself. Sometimes I'm a little selfish. Once an acquaintance of mine came to my home and started blabbering about a newly released branded mobile, "Listen, man, there is this luxurious mobile and it has this much 'RAM', that much 'GB' and thaaat much 'mAh' blah blah blaaah..." I couldn't just reject the conversation cause he was at my home and it would be arrogant to do so. I was least interested in it and I had nothing specific to talk to him, so I just pretended like I was listening. I was actually thinking, "how is this blabbering going to benefit me, dumbass?! I already have a mobile which is in good working condition and you know that. I'm not rich enough to buy this branded mobile and you know that. I have absolutely no reason to buy it and you know thattt! Then why the hell are you telling me this?! If I really want to know about it, I will just google it, period! You have distracted my thoughts about the Universe by this shit conversation. Now, please shut the f**k up and embrace silence, or if you really can't shut your mouth then go and talk to a wall, cause I'm equivalent to a goddamn wall! Let me peacefully think about philosophy, dumbass! No pun intended." I know this might sound rude. But guess what, these are just my thoughts. I wouldn't actually say that cause I'm not so good at humiliating people. Keep everything to yourself, even the swear words, is an introvert slogan.

Some people would ask me, "Why don't you go out much?" I wonder, what is it so disgusting about their houses that they mostly prefer to stay out?! I firmly believe that perception of freedom is different for different people. Again, I wouldn't say this, rather I would just smile and say "I go out only when necessary". You might wonder why I don't deal them with these hard hitting counters. That's because I'm such a nice guy! Ahem!! Never mind the self-reverence. Occasional self-praises keep my self-confidence high. Well, the reason is that people would argue over this opinion of mine. No argument, no exhaustion of energy. A simple strategy.

Recently an incident happened in my region. A guy brutally murdered his family. Initially, he told the police that the murder was not committed by himself but a soul. He said he was practicing astral projection, one day things got out of hand and a soul created by this projection committed this heinous crime. He kept saying unrelated things. Every time he was questioned, he came up with some crazy statements. This strange case baffled the police for days. Soon the media sensationalized this case with their own conspiracy theories. Obviously, they dug deeper into this guy's history and personality. Well, what did they find out? The guy is a freaking cyber psycho and an introvert!! This guy learned astral projection from internet. My relatives were like 'here is a new topic, let's exaggerate it'. One of them questioned me, "Are you addicted to internet?", I said..."No, not really". Next, "You are introverted, right?", "Yes, a little. Why?" You gotta see their faces. They stared at me as if I were the reincarnation of Jack the Ripper!!

Newspapers were literally celebrating this crime with articles written by psychologists and sociologists like '15 signs your child is an introvert', 'Top 10 brutal crimes committed by introverts' and so on. They were full on advice to the parents. 'A child must mingle with the society, best minds are made by the society, blah blah blah'. Seriously? As if all those best minds are saints! As long as an introvert isn't an anti-social, he is no threat to the society. I might be Asocial, but I'm not anti-social. I'm actually good at social interactions but I don't really enjoy putting on an extroverted mask, it sucks my energy. It's like asking humans to climb trees consistently like monkeys. Some are good at it, but climbing is cake-walking for monkeys. Don't even dare to mention this to monkeys, they would laugh their ass off. Tight slap for people with delusions of grandeur, even monkeys are better than us in some aspects. Die!! By the way, that psycho guy brought a bad name to introverts at the moment. I have prepared myself to exclaim to the critics 'this is INTROVERTAAA (spartaaa)!!!'. Well, not the right time I guess.

I don't really get bored in my own company. Perks of being an introvert! That's a kind of superpower I guess. Hell yeah!! Most people I know lose their mind and fall into depression when they are alone. I'm my best friend. Lots of interesting thought processes happen in my head. Occasionally, I live in my head. Does it sound like the movie 'fight club'? Well, nothing like that; the guy in 'fight club' is a f**king schizophrenic. That's savage. Fortunately, my thoughts are under my control. Most mental illnesses occur when your thoughts are beyond your control. So beware of your own monsters!

A recent survey suggests that extroverts get excited when they get to see a human face and nothing excites them more than a human face. Of course, there are so many other things that can excite them but that is irrelevant here, I think. The same survey suggests that the excitement of seeing a human face is equivalent to seeing some random objects, for introverts. I think that's pretty cool!! I would happily prefer random objects over people! Now, to my fellow introverts: we must unite to fight for our rights, but of course, separately in your own homes!!

Comments

  1. Superb! You got a fellow intro-bro here!

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  2. Ah yes, I've been an introvert since childhood and only fully realized it in the past several years. Treated the same way by my family, have always been 'the odd one out' but friends see me as the intellectual one.
    “Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. The mediocre mind is incapable of understanding the man who refuses to bow blindly to conventional prejudices and chooses instead to express his opinions courageously and honestly.”— Albert Einstein

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    Replies
    1. Yess!! We are the black sheep of the family!

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  3. Hell yeah. Hot therapy session, man.

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    1. Haha...thanks for reading dude!

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  4. I'm very much an introvert too, and I know a lot of people don't always understand it! I liked the book Quiet, and i gave it to my husband, who is very extroverted. He said it helped him understand me better and understand why I just need some space and some quiet time on occasion.

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    Replies
    1. Yes! Times have changed. People have started understanding us. A good sign!

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  5. Lovely post! I am an extrovert but my close friends are introverts so I can relate
    I am from Manipal and have my travel blog here http://hakunamatataspark.blogspot.in/

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  6. Hey Adil! Hope you doing well! :) I really liked your post. Though am an Ambivert, I could relate with you in most of the situations narrated by you above. And yes..I still feel the stares of my friends and family, when I say, I like would like being on silent place or perhaps even at home, rather than socializing..! Never mind!!

    Loads of Luck,
    Simran Gandhi

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  7. Nice and different post. I could relate a bit to me. But using slangs makes your blog unprofessional because there are some elderly people also who can read your blog.

    Also, as Indians, we think that by using " f**k" in our writing and speaking we may sound cool, but actually it is not.

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    1. Wedamor Admin, profanity isn't completely bad and there is no such rule which states that an Indian shouldn't use swear words. It helps to relieve stress and gives a feeling of liberation. And moreover, I said that word with a beep (f**k). A realistic person doesn't use swear words to sound cool, but to show his frustration. An elderly person reading my blog would understand that the use of such a word is apt for this post. And professionalism or unprofessionalism depends on the perception of an individual. Have a nice day :-)

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  8. I was able to read it backward. haha

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